Critical Reflection on Marriage and Family

 
 
 

SDA BUNGA

During the family life Sabbath at SDA Bunga Central Church on 5th May 2018, 12 married men and women aged 30 and above were voluntarily asked to come upfront to where the preacher was. Silence breaks in as the congregation wondered what the preacher was up to. After the 12 are up, the preacher then asks;

First question, “What is that one thing you loved about your parents especially father while growing up that you would love to pass on to your children?

Secondly, what is that one habit you hated about your father that you wouldn’t want your children to emulate?

Your head should be cracking now as you push your mind to remember what it is you like about your parent and what you hated about them while growing up. Well, all the 12 men and women or fathers and mothers had different habit likes and dislikes about their parents.

FIRST PARTICIPANT

“One thing I remember about my parents is, they were very prayerful parents. They would always wake up in the morning and start singing as an indicator it was time for prayer to wake us up so I would be very happy if my children imitate this habit.”

“What I hated about my father she continued is, he used to go beyond normal punishment when he disciplined us, I don’t do this to my children so I don’t want them to give hectic punishments to their children”.

SECOND PARTICIPANT

Still a lady, her best memory of her parents were, they showered her with lots of love and were very prayerful people. This taught her to love her children and wishes them to be just like her parents.

She hated the fact that her father was mostly an absent parent who would most of the times be away from home on business trips. This, she considered as a fact that business was more important to her father than his family.

THIRD PARTICIPANT

The third participant is a gentleman and an elder in church.

“The one habit I recall and loved about my father is the fact that he was a very honest man especially with finances”

“I hated his impatience with mediocre, he would never give room for anyone who was a mediocre in anything they did”.

FOURTH PATICIPANT

Still a gentleman, what he recalls about his parents is they were very hard working and one thing he loved about them is, they taught them (the children) to work hard and always bare a positive attitude.

This gentleman hated the fact that his father used to administer very severe punishments and never gave them room for explanation.

Remember I told you twelve participants took part in this exercise but we have only singled out four. Well, from all the contributions above, there was this single similarity with all the participants, whatever they said they loved about their parents, they indeed emulated just that, for those whose parents were prayerful, these parents (the participants) are indeed prayerful. For those who said their parents were trustworthy people, indeed they are trustworthy people.

What is the lesson to learn from all these inputs?

Mrs. Mugerwa Lillian who was the preacher that day as well as children and women’s director at Central Uganda Conference stated how parents do play a very big role in either building or breaking their children. She further explained that often times some parents tend to think that because their children are still young, they can do whatever they want to with a presumption the kids will not remember. Just as we have seen from the participants above, it never is easy for any child to forget what their parent does especially when it is something negative. Mrs. Mugerwa therefore urged parents not to do certain things with a perception their children are still young to understand.

In the same note, she elaborated how it is very hard for a child to be kind and polite around his friends when the parents are harsh and hostile around the children. A parent cannot start demanding for respect from their children when they do not offer the same kind of respect first to themselves, the children and then neighbors. “Remember what you do, your children will emulate. How do you expect your child to grow up with a positive attitude when you his/her parent is always negative?” Mrs. Mugerwa emphasized. She also sighted the fact that such kinds of behavior applies mostly to single parents who are either divorced or are having a hard time in marriage. “Why would a mother or father only speak evil about the other parent? Statements like, If it were not for me, you would be nothing given how useless your father or mother is, you are as stupid as your mother/father”, Mrs. Mugerwa asked.

According to her, such statements might seem minor but they do have a very huge impact on children hence she requested parents to desist from such talks and always try their best not to quarrel before children. Parents were advised to always find a way of settling their differences in a calm way away from the children.

In a quiet and attentive mood from the congregation, Mrs. Mugerwa continued to sight the negligence of some parents towards their children and instead focus on making money because they think providing for the needs of their children is more important than physically being there for them. This she said, becomes an emotional torture to the child which may in turn end in a child finding their own refuge whether from friends, the house help or anyone willing to give them a listening ear.

A story is told of a couple who became too busy with work and entrusted their children; a boy and girl to the house help. As time passed on, these kids would listen to the house help more than their parents and as a result they always considered whatever the house help told them as gospel truth. Sad as it is to believe, this house help introduced these kids to sex, which in this case was pure incest. By the time the parents got to realize something was wrong, these kids were so taken up that even when the house help was fired, they continued doing what was already introduced to them. Is this what a parent would love to see their children turn into because they are busy making money?

As Mrs. Mugerwa winded up, she noted that parents do have shared responsibilities in a home, both parents are responsible for how their children turn out to be therefore let no parent say it is the mother or father to blame for the bad habits of their children. Just as both parents will pride in the good deeds of their child or children, they should both in the same way take blame for the wrong deeds.

Food for thought

“It is easier to build a boy than repair a man”

Written by Joan Comfort Agazu

 
 

Police Commanders Confused on Orders to Confiscate Camouflage Attires

 
 
 

KAMPALA

District and Divisional Police Commander are uncertain on how to enforce a directive to confiscate camouflage attire similar to that of the army and police from the public, PRIME RADIO reports.

On Friday the previous, Asuman Mugenyi, the Director of Operations Uganda Police Force directed District and District Police Commanders to confiscate all camouflage clothes that resemble any military or police uniform.

He also directed District Security Committees across the country to stop shops selling the camouflage immediately. The district Security Committees, which comprises of the District Internal Security Officer, District Police Commander, Resident District Commissioner, District chairperson and the Chief Accounting Officer are expected to decide how to go about the directive.

PRIME RADIO talked to about 16 of the 157 District Police Commanders across the country on the implementation of the directive. However, none of them had a clue on how to implement the directive. The DPCs told PRIME RADIO on condition of anonymity that they were confused on how to implement the order especially with the business community.

"How do I go and stop someone from selling a cloth when there is no law that backs me," asked a DPC in Kampala. The UPDF act only criminalizes dressing in clothes that are of close likeliness to UPDF uniforms.

Patrick Onyango, the Deputy Police spokesperson, said he was only aware how they would confiscate the clothes from the civilians wearing them but not how to handle the business people.

"Talk to the DPC they are the ones who will be implementing the orders. They must be in the know on what to do," Onyango said. The DPCs couldn't speak on record and therefore referred PRIME RADIO to the Kampala Metropolitan Police Commander or spokesperson.

The KMP Spokesperson, Luke Owoyesigyire asked for time to consult with his bosses. He however told PRIME RADIO four days later that he was still trying to get in touch with the Director of Operation. "I still need to consult with the Director Operation," Owoyesigyire said.

In downtown Kampala, one can barely see the camouflage clothes on display since the order to confiscate them was issued. Most of the traders interviewed by PRIME RADIO, said they only bring in one or two clothes.

Faridah Nakato, a cloth dealer who used to sell camouflage trousers, short and vests, says they will have to stop selling them if the worst comes to worst. "What can we do? We will have to stop selling them. For those who still have some in stock, it's sad, "Nakato said.

 
 

LISTEN LIVE

Prime Classfieds